Causes And Consequences Of Divorce On Newly Married Couples

Causes And Consequences Of Divorce On Newly Married Couples
Abstract
Marriage is an institution whereby men and women are joined in a special kind of social and legal dependence for the purpose of founding and maintaining a family. Marriage by universal definition is the legal relationship between a husband and wife. It is a union between a man and a woman, at least so we thought until recently (Wikipedia, 2009).Many marriages collapses like a wall immediately after the marriage has been arranged, this because most of the newly married couples seem not to be satisfied with the marriages that do not last more than five years. They break up because they seem not to be satisfied as at marriage time.
The early years of marriage are critical period for couples because the early years may be volatile and some relationship dissolve and because the early years may get the stage for future distress or healthy people functioning. Marriages do not always last which result to divorces. “Divorce” simply put is the legal ending of a marriage. Divorce is the final termination of a marriage, cancelling the legal duties and responsibilities of marriage and dissolving the bonds of matrimony between two persons. A marriage must have legally been in existence before a divorce and consequential issues can arise. It is one of the most serious social problems in the modern world. It has become very common recently, and it affects all levels of society.
Chapter One
Introduction
1.1 Background to the Study
Divorce or marital separation or the dissolution of marriage is the “final termination of marital union, cancelling the legal duties and responsibilities of marriage and the dissolving of the bond of matrimony between the parties” (Mattoo & Ashai, 2012:113). Divorce is a remarkable development which has attracted global attention. Mekonnen, Kassa and Ayalew (2019) assert that divorce has severe effect on the family and the society. The psychological effect on “the initiator includes fear, distance, impatience, doubt resentment, guilt, blaming and fault finding. While the psychological impact on the receiver include shock, disloyalty, loss of control, ill-treatment, decreased self-esteem, anger, insecurity, a desire to get revenge and wishes to settle down” (Al-Ubaidu, 2017:3). Because of its psychological and social effects on the family and the society at large, government and non-governmental organizations have played vital roles in the elimination of marital separation.
Marriage reflects the purposes, character, and customs of the society in which it is found. Marriage is important for a transition of socio-economic values from old to young generation. Marriage in Ethiopia has its own historical background; “Decades of feudalism in the country contributed significantly to the institutionalization of the practice. In this period, elites used marriage as a means to establish or strengthen relationships with the bride’s or bridegroom’s family to ensure social, economic or political benefits”. Yisak & Camfield (2009) pointed out that in Ethiopia; marriage often makes primarily an economic (in terms of family wealth and property) transition through the influence of family members. Marriage is important to sharefeelings, responsibilities, and childbearing. Elders say that singles are incomplete without their better halves; better halves, by design, are members of the opposite sex. Thus marriage fulfills many gaps of human needs and wants which leads to successful life. Therefore, marriage helps to gain in productive (for consumption and saving) and or reproductive (human capital accumulation) activities. Individuals decide to form a household and living together yields higher personal welfare than living alone (Fafchamps & Quisumbing, 2006).
Marriage remains a deep-rooted culture among the societies (Claiborne, 2012). This implies that the cultures and values keep marriage for long time. However, norms and cultures are not static rather it changes with the change of global condition. Makara (2009) agreed that global changes are affecting the world where we live in; these are technological, communicative and political situations. Through these changes; the values of marriage becomes decline with increasing divorce practices. According to Ambert (2009), the number of marriage goes down in reverse with the flourishing of most western economies; which resulting in the flourishing of the welfare state that has coincided with a decline of the role of the family. Ciardi and Mammini (2008) confirmed that divorce has been introduced, and the value of marriages has been declined. This is also revealed by Fagan and Churchill (2012) on the impacts of cultural revolution which has great role for divorce in the society. As a result divorce rate is keeping increases, particularly in industrialized western countries at its all time high.
Divorce is much more complex than it appears on the surface. Ending a marriage relationship is not a one-time event; it is a process that it might be occurred in a court house. Usually, a series of events and behaviors on the part of one or both spouses erodes the positive feelings toward one or the other or both. Over a period of time, one or both of the marital partners becomes convinced that the relationship is intolerable, or at least it is not working then as a solution the marriage becomes end up (Fagan, 2012).
Societies have always varies views on marriage and divorce that they live in different parts of the world, and are influenced by the culture that one belongs to, among other. As many research works indicated that there are many different and complex causes and reasons for divorce, each of them specific to that particular marital couple (Buzzle, 2013). In general, Gersem (2006) concluded as all the divorce experience in the world today is as a result of one of the following: Immaturity, Infidelity, Abandonment, Lack of Communication, Physical Abuse, Drug and Alcohol Abuse, Ego Problem, Sexual Abuse, Joblessness, Lust, Cultural and Religious Differences, Crime, Incompatibility, Family Background, Failed Expectations and the like. Other researchers like Cathy (2013) categorized into three major causes of divorce based on her experience:
1. Laziness:
Here is a misguided belief that marriage will make us happy.
2. Lack of Communication Skills:
Expressing their feelings and openly listening to their spouse.
3. High Expectations:
Expectations and laziness can go hand in hand when it comes to predicting whether a marriage will end in divorce. Men and women both make a lot of assumptions when it comes to marriage and what to expect from a marriage. These assumptions are based on many variables and problems arise when the outcome of marriage doesn’t meet the assumptions or expectations. Communication before marriage can keep down any unrealistic expectations. Therefore where communication and expectations are interrelated each other, they play a role in the outcomes of marriage.
Divorce is a serious experience that affects the whole family system particularly its impact on children is critical. Seblewongel (2009) pointed that divorce is not an event happen at a single point in time; it represents an extended transition in lines of parents and children. Specifically children whose parents divorced are being at a great risk for psychological and social adjustment than from intact families (Sisay, 1997). Children of a divorced family are exposed for various problems and risks. Claiborne (2012) revealed that children of divorcee are more likely to be engaged in promiscuous (having many sexual partners), violence, crimes other related anti-social and criminal activities.
Divorce is “usually perceived as the solution to difficult marital relationships irrespective of the repercussion on the couple, children, adolescents and society at large. Divorce is one of the most stressful life events a person can experience regardless of whether one sought the divorce or was unprepared for the divorce”( Ahiaoma 2013:163). Divorce results in crisis for family members. For adults, divorce signifies the loss of an intimate relationship that also brought security and support. It also signifies a loss of hope and dreams as well as feelings of failure (Olaniyi, 2015:19). The rate of divorce in recent times has increased significantly and it has been the subject of discourse among social scientists from a wide range of disciplines in the last two decades. Unfortunately, insufficient number of studies in this area has been conducted in the South South geopolitical zone of Nigeria. This study was undertaken to fill this research gap by analyzing the causes and effects of divorce
1.2 Statement of the Problem
As many research works like Makara (2009) indicated that the causes and reasons for divorce are enormous, each of them specific to that particular couple’s of marital relationship; their individual experiences and personal problems. Generally, in the same study stated that the most divorcing experience in the world today is similar even different writers viewed in different angles. Those are revolving around some common reasons which related to social, economic, psychological and emotional, political and cultural conditions of the couples. Women’s changing roles, infidelity, financial problems and immaturity are mentioned as important causes of divorce, in contrast high-income, well-educated women are more prone to divorce (Balestrino et al., 2008). If women become a professional in modern times, it can be a problem while they neglect their family.
Most of the time divorce has negative impact on divorcee families as well as on the society. According to Fagan & Churchill (2012) the effects of divorce is irreversible harm to all who involved in, but critical to the children. The problems often are affecting the children even before parents’ divorce, starting from the conflict between parents and painful divorce process (Wallerstein, 2012). When children have got less attention, receive less emotional support, financial assistance, and practical help for academic support and encouragement. They may lose stimulation of socialization; resulting decrease of pride, affection and social maturity of the children.
Zinn & Etzin (1999) stated that following parental divorce, children are encountered psychological problems like depression, trauma, anxiety and unhappiness. According to Markham (2013) divorce has both short and long term effects: if the parental divorced children are too young to understand the situation fully they might feel guilty or responsible for the divorce. In the short term effect they become increasingly aggressive, violent, uncooperative, and emotionally become needy. Markham (2013) agreed that effects of divorce on children seem to be short term, once they fade; it takes time to adjust their living situation. According to Markham (2013) result parental divorced children are suffered with multi dimensional effect; those children are more likely to be less educated, experience poverty or socio-economic disadvantage, and develop anti-social behavior. And may including other behavioral problems like drug and/or alcoholic addictions, get married or cohabit at earlier age, resulting to expose highly for separation or divorce.
Therefore, this study is focused on causes of divorce and its consequences with specific emphases on economic, social and psychological/emotional impacts of divorce on newly married couples. In spite of the seriousness of the problem, there is no sufficient available study on the subject area to create awareness on the minds of individuals and to address problems to the concerned bodies and /or organizations to alleviate the problems. Because of this reason the researcher is motivated to assess the causes of divorce and its impacts on children wellbeing in particular and divorcee’s family in general.
1.3 Objectives of the Study
The main objective of this study is to examine the CAUSES AND CONSEQUENCES OF DIVORCE ON NEWLY MARRIED COUPLES. Specifically this study aims:
- To examine the level of perceived causes of divorce in South South geopolitical zone of Nigeria.
- To evaluate the effects of divorce in South South geopolitical zone of Nigeria.
- To examine if there is a difference between the opinion of male and female students on perceived causes of divorce in South South geopolitical zone.
- To examine if there is difference between the opinion of male and female students on the effects of divorce in South South geopolitical zone.
- To determine strategies for effective control of divorce in South South zone of Nigeria.
1.4 Hypotheses of the Study
H1: There is no significant difference between the opinion of male and female students on perceived causes of divorce in South South geopolitical zone of Nigeria.
H2: There is no significant difference between the opinion of male and female students on the effects of divorce in South South geopolitical zone of Nigeria.
1.5 Significance of the Study
Nigeria is composed of multi-ethnic and religious groups, as many research works indicated divorce is higher in urban than rural, and also its rate become increasing through time. This social ill should be getting a reliable solution, for this reason the researcher believes on research works which is providing relevant information for policy makers, individuals and other researchers. This helps them for taking appropriate measures to minimize the prevalence of divorce, while enables to maximize children’s wellbeing.
1.6 Scope of the Study
The scope of this study is limited to present major causes of divorce and its negative effects on newly married couples, with a specific focus on children’s wellbeing in south-south Nigeria.
1.7 Limitation of the Study
Like any other studies, to investigate the causes of divorce and its effects on newly married couples so there need to generate data on the basis of divorcee family. There were a number of limitations and hence, this study has faced the following major limitations. First, it was difficult to get the targeted population within the research sites. Thus each divorce case was not recorded , where it is expected to be filed. Even it was not possible to find the data that shows the number of divorce at court level.
It was extremely difficult to get the targeted total population to use actual sample size from that population within the targeted sites. That was taken time and difficult to take proportional sample size from targeted population. Secondly, custodial parents were not happy and difficult to get their consent to interview their children; even they did not want to be interviewed as the issue is sensitive to them. That was time taken and difficult to get proportional sample of target population.
Chapter Five
Conclusion and Recommendations
In this study, attempts have been made to underscore the various factors that are responsible for divorce or marital separation in the Nigerian context. The effects of divorce and strategies for effective control of divorce were also examined. The study revealed, through its perceived findings, that divorce has negative effects on the couples, their children and the society at large. The study also revealed that couples who experienced divorce develop the feelings of rejection, sense of failure, guilty, depression and self-disapproval. In addition, the reality of today for single parents and children is that divorce often means a change in school, neighborhood and peer groups. Physical dislocation may ultimately have an influence on many aspects of the children‟s life, including academic performance, peer relations, psychological well-being and physical health. It is clear that any treatment of the issues surrounding divorce, custody and access is incomplete without an understanding of the dynamics of domestic violence. Failure to take these cases into consideration can only increase the emotional trauma of those involved or worse, increase their physical danger. A marital relationship can be strengthened through keeping certain standards such as love, establishing open communication channels and maintaining a close enjoyable physical contact. Other factors include sharing views on work and raising children as well as traits such as flexibility and realism that can help couples avoid divorce. Therefore, a healthy family enjoys a clear balance between cohesion and adaptability. Olson, 1989 cited in Al-Gharaibeh (2018) highlights eight characteristics of a cohesive family. These are:
- Attraction;
- Personal differences and distinction;
- Support and encouragement;
- Attachments;
- A sense of psychological security;
- Family bonding and connectedness;
- Care for physical hygiene and appearance;
- Positive affective involvement.
In conclusion, this study has contributed to the literature on perceived causes and effects of divorce in Nigeria. From the findings of the study, the following recommendations are made:
- Support systems can help mitigate some of the negative effects associate with divorce. The support can be provided by parents, extended family members, peers and school management. E.g. school management should identify and provide children of divorced with curriculum changes and additional facilities to help them cope with divorce.
- Government and non-governmental organizations together should intensify efforts to ensure that all unhappily married spouses have access to pre and post marital counseling that is affordable across the length and breadth of the country. This will help prevent or ameliorate the negative consequences of marital separation.
- Women are urged to strive to be economically independent. This will help women alleviate the negative economic consequences of divorce.
- Young men are urged to have a source of livelihood before going into marriage.
- Couples going through a marriage crisis are urged to seek help and counseling from social and family specialists, rather than from only relatives and friends, to resolve marital issues.
- State and local government authorities should establish counseling centers as a form of social support to help women build effective coping skills and provide a supportive context which may reduce the sense of loneliness and isolation experienced by many divorced adults.
- University management across the country should introduce and offer the course „Family and Marriage Counseling‟ that will help youth to acquire requisite skills and habit culture for successful marital life. Healthy living and negative effects of divorce should be emphasized in the curriculum.
- The Nigerian movie industry should intensify efforts by directing various drama series and programmers to present the concept of marriage realistically in terms of the challenges facing the family and how to deal with them.
- There is urgent need in teaching multiple topics on family, marriage and disadvantages of divorce both at secondary and post-secondary schools in order to encourage people to establish effective relationships.
- In the marital relationship the groom and the bride should learn to forgive each other, been patient enough and approached each other more gently and lovingly when reconciliation is required.
- The Legislature or the Nigerian Law Review Commission should, as a matter of urgency, set legal machinery in motion for a review of the Matrimonial Causes Act with the objective of improving some of the relief initiated to meet with societal expectations and reality.
- Further study is recommended for other researchers to establish the relationship between female education and marital stability.
- Research on female employment and marital instability is also recommended.


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